Miracle Share

The social network for students and teachers of "A Course in Miracles"

Ask: How do I use ACIM when others won't forgive me?

My adult children have refused to speak to me for years. I have explained my past actions and I have apologized but this has not brought about a change in my relationship with them. How can I use what ACIM teaches to change my thinking about this? – Anonymous

By taking responsibility and apologizing you have taken steps to undo the guilt in your mind that the personal thought system (ego) may have been using as an obstacle to peace. This clears the way to peace for you. But whether or not your children want peace is up to them. Every mind has peace in it, but most are not willing to work through their obstacles to peace. Most continue to seek peace through grudges and victimhood rather than through an awareness of Truth and the releasing of the personal story.

Frankly, even if your children came around and forgave you the personal thought system in your mind would find something else lacking in the personal life about which to gripe. It can never be lastingly happy, because it is a thought system of lack. This is why personal peace is not true inner peace. And this is why the only way to peace is to release the personal thought system, not to try to fix it or to make it happy. If you want inner peace, no matter what is happening in the personal self’s life, you must grow your awareness of the Truth within you.

If you find that you cannot let your children go and this continues to be an obstacle to peace for you, then you need to look into your own mind for the thoughts, beliefs, and attachments that are obstacles to peace. You will want to invite the Holy Spirit into this process.

3 members like this

Comment

You need to be a member of Miracle Share to add comments!

Join Miracle Share

Comment by Sallyan Gelic on February 1, 2012 at 12:56pm: Hi , I am answering this as if it were my children because my son refuses to forgive me for the effects of divorcing his father . What my son is showing me is that there is an aspect of myself that I need to forgive for the effects of divorce. Maybe i have stubbornly refused to forgive myself on the self same issues. I had an horrendous childhood made worst by divorce and then i caused that pain to my children. I feel that these issues are been reflected back to us and really our children are of great service to us. I have gone through the forgiveness process today again of everyone involved and myself of course whilst acknowledging it never really happened. Really it is about forgiveness of oneself to release guilt and barriers to the awareness of love.Hope this helps in some way x

Comment by Hugh Magee on January 27, 2012 at 3:46pm: Do you know the saying: "What you think of me is none of my business!"?

In the Course, one forgives regardless of the outcome.